STRESS Takes more Than our Sanity~ It is Stealing Our Life Moments
When I was young I used to look at stress as a motivator. Now that I am older and look back I realize what a threat it is to us. What stress really does to us is steal our moments, our joy, and yes eventually our sanity.
When you have something large to accomplish. The stress often yells to you ~~HEY LISTEN UP~ you have something that must be done. If you are a procrastinator you might especially think it helps ~ the deadline it tomorrow, so you better get moving. Yes, to a point this does work and is okay to use every now and then. However, when you are so busy and the school asks you to do the sports banquet, do not say yes just because you know when the time comes you will have no choice but to make it work. That is a bad way to make decisions when what you are really thinking is that I can not do one more thing.
I started out as a mother of 1~ like most of us do. It is amazing how the simple task of taking a shower became ~ I TOOK A SHOWER TODAY ! Hurray!! But we adjusted and as time went on you were able to be presentable most of the time.
What comes up next is what no one tells you. You will one day wish for those days back because now you live in your car! Your kids have started going to school and your new stress is keeping up with homework and school activities. Now let’s add in dance class, PTO meetings, basketball, music lessons, and oh yes you agreed to do the banquet for the school. These all seemed harmless at the time because you added them slowly and over time. Now you look at your calendar and realize that, in the next 3 months, you only have one evening without something written on it. This was me and so many other mothers I know.
Moms start out with many things on our to do list! As the kids get older you only add to it. If we are not careful, stress can have a very negative affect on us and our family. One day you will be trying to tell your daughter to pick up her ….. something off the floor. You will be looking at the offending object on the floor and, although your brain knows what it is, you cannot name that you want her to pick up her SOCKS! Don’t laugh ~ This can happen to you. If it has happened to you~ I hope your are relieved to hear it is happening to other mothers and you don’t need a CT scan.
I know I am joking about it, but stress puts a lot of “stress” on our bodies. Are you having more headaches lately? Not sleeping well? These are minor problems related to stress. However, years and years of constant stress to your body can cause serious health issues.
Stress can also affect your mood and your happiness. There are the every day moments you are missing. Yes, your adorable chubby 2 year-old just did the cutest thing and you thought “awe” for a moment, but then your brain went back to hurry we have to get dinner and leave it 10 minutes for baseball. Or you just watched your daughter in her first concert. Yes, you saw it, but did you experience it? Or were you in your head thinking ~ if this ends by 7, I can still make it to the basketball game. When we have so much to do ~ stress is literally stealing our moments.
One day I called my grandmother looking for some advice. I was feeling like a failure as a mother. I just could not accomplish enough. The to-do list was so long. Now I thought my Grams was just amazing. She would watch all the grand-kids, sit and talk with me while she made lunch, and make cinnamon rolls from scratch ( I have had this on my list for 20 years). She raised 7 kids and all without a microwave, dishwasher, and (for many years) a washing machine. How with all of these conveniences, I could not keep up. You know what she told me~ “Times have changed Christy. I did not run my kids all over town for the whole evening. The kids were not involved in basketball year round. And most moms were at home with me so we had a lot of support.”
We as moms have picked up many new jobs! Working outside the home is just the tip of the iceberg. However, we really have not let go of anything. The stress we put on ourselves is not worth what we are getting back. We don’t need to be perfect. The only person who expects that from us~ is ourselves.